A Boy Named Sue Myrick?

Posted October 5, 2005 at 6:47pm

Maybe they’re just a bunch of Johnny Cash fans over at the Government Printing Office. Or maybe they thought Rep. Walter Jones Jr. (R-N.C.) would grow up tougher with a name like Sue, just as the story goes in Cash’s famous song, “A Boy Named Sue.” Whatever the reason, the problem remains: There’s a boy named Sue in the official Congressional Pictorial Directory for the 109th Congress, thanks to a printing mistake by the GPO. [IMGCAP(1)]

There they are, looking all spiffy in their photos in the North Carolina delegation section. Jones is smiling but serious, wearing a white shirt and a blue tie with black diamonds and what looks like little yellow stripes on it. On page 102, he is listed as Walter B. Jones, of Farmville (3rd district), Republican — 6th term. Unfortunately for two people involved, on page 103, Jones’ picture appears again. And underneath it says: Sue Wilkins Myrick, of Charlotte (9th district), Republican — 6th term.

Whoops!

The GPO is having an anxiety attack about the mistake after distributing copies of the book far and wide across Capitol Hill. Veronica Meter, director of public relations at GPO, said the office has apologized to both Myrick and Jones and is working to somehow, some way correct the problem, short of reprinting the books. “We very much regret the error,” she said.

Myrick is being very cool about the situation, considering her picture doesn’t even appear in the directory. Her spokesman, Andy Polk, said the GPO was very apologetic and that the Congresswoman was very understanding.

“Sue didn’t have any plans for her friends to sign her yearbook before she went home on winter break anyway, so she doesn’t think the GPO should spend the money to print new ones,” he said, adding Myrick doesn’t want the printing office to spend gobs of money reprinting new directories.

Jones, meanwhile, is having a field day. A House floor manager asked the Congressman last week if he had seen the picture. Jones looked at it and said, “It’s not so bad.” Then he looked at the name underneath it. “When I saw Sue’s name I just burst out laughing.”

So he took the book with him to the Republican Study Committee meeting last Wednesday. “I went up to Sue and said, ‘Don’t be offended and don’t sue me.’ I showed her and we both had a good laugh. She should be offended, but not at me. Here’s this ugly old man’s face where her lovely face should be.”

Senate Stoners. Being fourth in the line of succession to the presidency as President Pro Tempore of the Senate, Sen. Ted Stevens (R-Alaska) isn’t usually described in superlatives. But when we spotted him at the Rolling Stones concert at the MCI Center on Monday night with his much hipper, younger wife, Catherine, it dawned on us: Stevens could be the most powerful Rolling Stones fan in the entire U.S. government! (Until now, his only superlative was being tied for first place with Vice President Cheney for “the gruffest” man in the U.S. government.)

To be fair, Stevens might also have a shot at the superlative for “most romantic husband in the line of succession to the presidency.” He said he bought the Stones tickets as a birthday gift for his lovely wife, who declined to give us her age. Stevens, who turns 82 next month, said through his spokeswoman, Courtney Boone, that as much as he’d like accolades for being the coolest Stones fan around, he “went as the husband of a fan who had a grand time dancing to one of her favorite bands.”

Mrs. Stevens, a lawyer at the Washington firm Mayer, Brown, Rowe and Maw, was none too pleased that a Roll Call intern called to ask her age. But she was exceedingly kind in telling our aspiring journalist: “I liked listening to the Stones while studying at law school and I never had a chance to see them before. They were awesome! At the concert, my brother told me, ‘Just remember, they’re older than you.’ So there you go, I’m younger than the Stones.”

Mrs. Stevens’ favorite Stones tune? “Satisfaction.”

Mick and Miers. Since the Stones omitted their controversial “neo-con” song from their repertoire Monday night, Mick Jagger found other ways of taking a swipe at the Bush administration. Jagger’s hilarious Harriet Miers diatribe even had top staffers on the Senate Judiciary Committee laughing nervously.

Blain Rethmeier, the press secretary for committee Republicans, tried his hardest not to laugh when the saucy, aging rock star joked that Miers, the Supreme Court nominee, was in the audience somewhere, very tired from her SCOTUS search, which, according to Jagger, ended with Miers looking in the mirror saying, “Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest judge of all?”

The crowd ate it up, and Rethmeier definitely got a laugh out of it, though he tried to muffle it. He politely declined comment on Jagger’s mirror-mirror joke given Miers’ pending nomination.

Stones fan Stephanie Cutter, a top aide in Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid’s (D-Nev.) office, also declined to play ball on Jagger’s Miers jibe. But she jokingly offered: “Harriet Miers’ love for the Rolling Stones might be the only view of hers that we ever learn. But, at least it’s a good view.”

Other well-known and quasi-famous fans spotted at the concert included: Sen. John Thune (R-S.D.), who complimented HOH’s boots at a bar after the show (and HOH is still blushing); Rep. Marsha Blackburn (R-Tenn.), who didn’t know what her favorite Stones tune was; Karl Rove deputy Barry Jackson; and bad boy pollster Frank Luntz, who indicated he was engaged in a blanket boycott of Roll Call.

Santorum Hits King. Be it a typo or a Freudian Slip, aides to Sen. Rick Santorum (R-Pa.) made one.

In a fundraising letter sent to at least some folks in the Keystone State last week, Santorum asked supporters to stand with him to oppose “big money leftists, such as George Soros and insurance magnate Peter King — men who contributed more than $30 million all by themselves to defeat Republicans in the last election.”

Peter King? He is powerful, but he’s hardly a multimillionaire insurance magnate. He is, of course, the GOP Congressman from New York who recently became chairman of the House Homeland Security Committee. Santorum (or his finance people who wrote the letter) obviously meant to say insurance magnate Peter Lewis, not Peter King.

So why did they have King on the mind when they drafted the letter? King, ever humble, pontificated, “I guess one downside to being elected chairman is that people assume you are rich — rather than just good-looking and charming.”

Santorum’s spokesman, Robert Traynham, was less than thrilled about the error, but offered, “Well it’s pretty obvious that our spellchecker was missing in action the day that letter went out.” Scott Hechinger contributed to this report.

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