Home

Pummel Your Liver on GOP Debate Night

Care to make the first GOP primary debate that much more palatable?  

Political observers at Cloture Club and the Sun Times Network suggest getting good and blasted.  

(Courtesy Cloture Club)

(Courtesy Cloture Club)

Cloture Club has devised a way to make one hang on any given candidate’s every word: attach serious drinking consequences to all the bloviating. The recommendations most likely to send blood alcohol content readings through the roof include:

  • Drink 1 for every Cecil the Lion reference; Slam a beer if anyone compares him to Planned Parenthood.
  • Slam a Tecate, Dos Equis, or Corona anytime a candidate refers to how much he loves Hispanic Americans; BONUS: Issue 1 drink to friend if you finish and say “Ay Dios Mio.”
  • Make the Democrat in the room drink 1 if a candidate promises to repeal Obamacare.

Having sprung from the Capitol Hill community, it makes sense for Cloture Club to seed its debate pastime with references that will undoubtedly pour forth from the mouths of sitting lawmakers.  

Not so for the Sun Times’ diversion , which focuses exclusively on the anticipated rantings and ravings of political neophyte Donald Trump.  

(Screenshot)

(Screenshot)

This game plays it pretty conservative at first — take a drink each time The Donald calls someone a “dummy” or “loser” (his go-to insults) or blathers on about how rich he is — but quickly leaps to potentially life threatening.

“Do your best impression of Sen. Chuck Schumer, D-N.Y., and drink EVERYTHING IN THE ROOM [EMPHASIS ADDED] if/when Trump … Gives out someone’s personal cellphone number. Discusses his hair. Reveals an actual, bona fide plan, for a specific policy position. Mentions Sarah Palin without being prompted."
Granted, he’s unlikely to cross paths with fellow presidential hopeful Lindsey Graham of South Carolina, who’s polling too low to clinch a spot in the prime-time debate. But HOH has got to believe some of the other candidates are going to make cracks about sharing their personal information — a challenge which could provoke Trump to spout off closely guarded digits left and right.  

Related: Fill the Hours on GOP Debate Night Trumping the 2016 Contenders See photos, follies, HOH Hits and Misses and more at Roll Call's new video site. Get breaking news alerts and more from Roll Call in your inbox or on your iPhone.