Feb. 8, 2016 SIGN IN | REGISTER

Hill Navigator: The Line Between Friend and Co-Worker

Roll Callís Hill Navigator advice column helps staffers with sticky or complicated situations they find themselves in on Capitol Hill. Each week, we take the most interesting submissions from our inbox and answer your concerns. This week: when the firing hits close to home.

Q: A few months ago, a personal friendís boss (who is also my boss in a different capacity) asked me to find a new staff member for him. Soon after, I realized that I was finding a replacement for my friend, who is essentially having all of his responsibilities stripped from him, though not being fired, in what I have come to call promote-a-firing. Eventually, my friend is going to realize whatís going on and completely hate me for having a role in the entire thing. When this happens, how do I walk the line between professional responsibility and friendly loyalty without failing at both?

A: You donít. I donít think thereís much of a line for you to walk at all. What you can do is use the limited window of realization to make your move.

It sounds like youíve come to the conclusion that your friend is getting promote-a-fired (great term, by the way). So before you can confirm that with the higher-ups, have a quick, off-the-record discussion with your friend about what youíre doing without drawing any additional conclusions. If your friend comes to the same conclusion you did ó that heís on his way out ó be a willing listener, but donít validate that for him unless you know for sure that itís happening.

If you donít know for certain, be explicit that you donít. Otherwise youíre yelling fire in Statuary Hall and causing panic without just cause.

You owe it to your friend to give him a heads-up if heís getting fired/marginalized/relocated to the basement. But youíre better off dousing the situation with a neutralizing agent and letting your friend do the digging. Let him ask the boss how the new staffer will work with him. Perhaps that will be the jumping-off point to have the larger conversation about his career. But you donít have to be part of it. Raise the flag and then get back to work. Take him out for a beer afterward and find out what happened.

Q: I have been doing a bunch of info meetings with Hill staffers. I donít want to be annoying, but whatís the best way to follow up, and how often should I do it?

A: Three steps to staying front-of-mind without going overboard: Send a real, handwritten thank-you note and an email shortly after the meeting, and then another email a few weeks later.

The handwritten thank-you note has not gone out of style, no matter what Evite tells you, and people love getting mail. So spend a few bucks at Papyrus and send real thank-you cards to anyone who takes time to meet with you.

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