Heard on the Hill

Congress Decoded: 'My Good Friend' and Others

With all the charged doublespeak clouding the air in both chambers these days (see: nuclear option, Senate and farm bill, House), we here at HOH thought this might be a good time for a refresher course on deciphering the often perverse lexicon of Capitol Hill:

1. Congressional phraseology: “My good friend”

Translation: “Gotcha now, you sonofab...”

2. Congressional phraseology: “Will the gentleman yield?”

Translation: “Have you lost your freaking mind?”

3. Congressional phraseology: “… to revise and extend my remarks … ”

Translation: “First time I’m seeing this, but I promise to clean things up in the footnotes.”

4. Congressional phraseology: “I ask unanimous consent … ”

Translation: “Don’t come at me, bro (por favor).”

5. Congressional phraseology: “I note the absence of a quorum.”

Translation: “Where my dogs at?”

6. Congressional phraseology: “Pro forma”

Translation: "Gone fishin’."

7. Congressional phraseology: “Aye”

Translation: “What’s the worst that could happen?”

8. Congressional phraseology: “No”

Translation: “Convince me.”

Everybody got that?