July 26, 2014 SIGN IN | REGISTER

Heard on the Hill: In Enemy Territory

Unfortunately for a guy who spent most of Tuesday with Members of Congress and members of the National Press Club, country singer Toby Keith doesn’t seem to think much of politicians or the media.

Keith, who visited Washington, D.C., before departing for his eighth overseas tour with the USO, spoke at the press club and made it clear that he was none too fond of the two professions that make up much of official Washington.

Asked whether he could imagine running for office someday, the “Courtesy of the Red, White & Blue” singer said he wasn’t cut out for the job. “I couldn’t take all the lies,” he said. “I couldn’t shake your hand and then walk five feet away and say something bad about you. That’s how politicians are — they kill me.”

Too bad for Keith; he was slated Tuesday night to attend an awards ceremony with the Military Officers Association of America at which he was expected to receive an award for his support of the military, along with Sen. Jim Webb (D-Va.) and Reps. John McHugh (R-N.Y.) and Susan Davis (D-Calif.).

Keith describes himself as a Democrat but acknowledges that he’s hard to pin down politically. “The lefty friends think I’m a Nazi, and my righty friends think I’m a hippie,” he said.

He also indicated that he wasn’t overly impressed with reporters, complaining during his press club appearance about journalistic sins from headlines that don’t match up with the stories that they hype to reporters who review his concerts unfavorably.

“I’ll take you all on,” he joked to the scribes assembled for the luncheon speech.

Life’s Lessons on Film. Sen. Orrin Hatch likes movies — in fact, the Utah Republican has found the cinema to be quite the educational experience.

Hatch joined actor Dwayne Johnson (better known as “The Rock,” although he doesn’t go by that moniker anymore) at a luncheon at Hotel Monaco on Tuesday hosted by the Motion Picture Association of America.

And during his remarks, Hatch shared some lessons that he’s garnered from watching movies over the years. Among our favorites:

• When police officers conduct criminal investigations, at some point it will become necessary to visit a strip club.

• A police officer is always assigned a partner who is his exact opposite.

• If the pilot of a plane becomes incapacitated during a flight, anybody can land it, so long as people working at a nearby control tower provide guidance.

• If a character is running from police, he can always take cover in a St. Patrick’s Day parade. (See: “The Fugitive,” which notably features a cameo from Illinois Democratic Sen. Roland Burris.)

• Most soldiers will survive a war — “unless you make the mistake of showing a picture of your sweetheart back home.”

• If a large pane of glass is visible on screen, somebody will get thrown through it.

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