Because if you’ve ever seen Dick, you know what we mean, there’s just no way in hell that Dick Wadhams is gay. He’s a man’s man all right, but not that kind of man’s man — a rumply, pudgy Dockers-wearing hombre who would never pass for metrosexual, much less homosexual.

Wadhams, who is a widower, was not pleased with the outing.

Here’s how it happened: The Los Angeles Times joined the mainstream media melee in writing about the “pink purge” of what many are now referring to as the “gay mafia” in the Republican Party in the wake of the former Rep. Mark Foley (R-Fla.) scandal. The paper referred to an infamous list circulating around town that names gay GOP staffers and added that Allen, a staunch opponent of same-sex marriage (which is on the ballot this fall in Virginia), has a campaign manager who is gay.

Wadhams asked the Times for a correction, which the paper is expected to run today. (The correction, says one newspaper source, clarifies that it is another Allen aide, not his campaign manager, who is gay.)

One former GOP Congressional aide who has been targeted by outing campaigns was infuriated that the L.A. Times and other newspapers are writing about the list at all, calling it revolting.

“You are talking about the private life of somebody who’s not on the ballot and doesn’t cast votes in either the House or the Senate,” he said.

Staffers on the Hill who know Wadhams laughed when they read the news about him Wednesday. “Dick can’t be gay. You ever seen the guy’s haircut?” one of the aides asked HOH.

Plus, he said, “Dick used to work in a mortuary. No gay guy would do that.”

Well, except for one of the sons on HBO’s Emmy Award-winning show, “Six Feet Under.”

Pledge Allegiance to the Tie. It must have been pretty weird for Rep. John Peterson (R-Pa.) Wednesday night when a crowd of about 60 people pledged allegiance to his tie.

Before the start of Peterson’s debate against Democratic challenger Don Hilliard, the incumbent asked everyone to say the Pledge of Allegiance. But as a reporter for the Centre Daily Times of State College, Pa., wrote on his newspaper’s blog, there was no American flag anywhere in the hall to pledge allegiance to.

So the moderator, spotting Peterson’s wide, American flag-themed tie, asked everyone to turn their attention to Peterson, who obliged by putting his right hand over his breast and holding his tie out for the crowd to revere.

Oddly enough, everybody in the debate hall took their Pledge of Allegiance to Peterson’s tie seriously. Probably too much so, given the circumstances, one source said.

At least Peterson’s spokesman, Chris Tucker, realized how strange it was, joking, “I’m just glad they spotted the Congressman’s tie before things got out of hand. You have to wonder what other garments might’ve been called into service had a representation of the stars and stripes not been immediately apparent.”

Tucker added, “It was really neck-and-neck between the American flag tie and his lucky Steelers tie — which, in retrospect, probably could’ve been enlisted for a similar purpose in a pinch.”

Happy Hour or Nervous Hour? The buzz on K Street on Wednesday was that a small group of Republican-connected lobbyists had organized an after-work drinks session with Hill staffers at Zengo, the trendy Gallery Place restaurant. What’s interesting is that the Hill invitees were Democratic House aides who work for moderate, pro-business Members.

One Democratic lobbyist who got wind of the event called it a “shameless” attempt to reach out to Democrats at a time when the party looks poised to take control of the House. “I take comfort in the fear of Republican lobbyists,” he added.

But one of the point people on the bipartisan happy hour, lobbyist Chris Cox, a vice president of the all-Republican firm DC Navigators, said the gathering was actually initiated by a few House Democratic chiefs of staff.

“They were saying they didn’t know a lot of Republican business lobbyists very well,” Cox said. So Cox tried to get some of his friends together with the aides.

“Oh puh-leeze,” said one Democratic lobbyist.

“Why in God’s name would Democratic staffers call up Republican lobbyists, three weeks before an election that everyone’s predicting will result in a Democratic House, and say, ‘I’d like to get to know some of the Republican lobbyists downtown,’” said the Democratic lobbyist. “It’s absurd.”

According to two sources familiar with the event, and a portion of a reminder e-mail shared with HOH, participants from K Street were to include lobbyists John Green of the Federalist Group, David Hobbs of the Hobbs Group, Eric Pelletier of General Electric and Mike Smythers of Burlington Northern Railroad, none of whom could not be reached for comment.

Cox said schedules were getting hectic and it wasn’t clear who would actually turn up.

Hot Spot. Ashok Bajaj, longtime mover and shaker on the Washington restaurant scene, snagged one of Esquire magazine’s best new restaurant awards this week. Bajaj, owner of the storied hot spots Bombay Club and the Oval Room, won Esquire’s award for his latest incarnation, Rasika, an eclectic Indian restaurant in the Penn Quarter that has been attracting lobbyists, Hill staffers and even the occasional ink-stained wretch.

Sure, Bajaj is happy. But his regulars at the new place are thrilled, if nervous that their secret favorite place will now be overrun. BellSouth lobbyist Lyndon Boozer, a regular at Rasika and other Bajaj-owned haunts, calls Bajaj the “maharajah of upscale D.C. dining because he treats his customers like royalty.”

“He once told me he likes patrons to have their checks available or on the table in 59 minutes, not 60. When time is money, you appreciate that,” Boozer said.

Matt Bennett, vice president of the center-left thinktank Third Way, had one of those quintessential see-and-be-seen moments at Bajaj’s Bombay Club not long ago. He, his brother and their wives were seated next to super power couple Alan Greenspan and Andrea Mitchell, who were having dinner with Jim Lehrer and his wife, novelist Ann Lehrer.

“That’s what passes for royalty in Washington,” Bennett said, joking that he was a little miffed that he didn’t even get to eavesdrop on any good economic gossip. They were drinking and laughing a lot, so if they were talking about interest rates, then we have a lot to examine in the Greenspan legacy.”

Congrats to Bajaj on his latest award.

Kate Ackley contributed to this report.

Please send your hot tips, juicy gossip or comments to hoh@rollcall.com.